I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
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