Where are you?
In a non slutty way
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
