The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize