This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
Randomize
