sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Watching her eat just hurts me
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize