Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
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