chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
Randomize