I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize
