i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
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