Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
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