i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
If I die, sorry about rent.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
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