So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize