i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
Randomize
