After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
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