11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize