I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
