i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
