I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize