I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
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