I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Randomize
