I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
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