I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
Randomize
