just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Randomize
