They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize
