He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize
