I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Randomize
