So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Randomize