Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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