Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize