I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Randomize
