I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
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