i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
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