I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
only if we run a train.
done.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Randomize
