he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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