Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
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