More tranny stories later!
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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