After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
