Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
