As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
Why is your signature on my underwear?
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
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