how can u be prego again
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Randomize
