these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
from now on my penis is your penis
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
Randomize
