I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
Randomize
