I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
Randomize
