He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
I gave the guy a $20 tip on a $9 cab ride, he thought I was just bad at math but I was really just incredibly thankful to be alive and home.
I was like "don't worry, I'm a math major and you deserve the shit out of that 222% tip"
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
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