lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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