Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Randomize
