We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Randomize
