you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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