He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
