wrigley field is MILF paradise
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
Randomize
