we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
I just googled if crying burns calories
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
Randomize
